My transition

A gay teenage boy just got out of a therapy session with his counselor and is now talking to his friends in the courtyard at lunch. 

When I was a junior in high school I was still coming to terms with who I was and my sexuality. The way I dressed, talked, and acted was very different from how I act today. I would wear baggy jeans and the most expensive shoes, like Jordans, just so I could fit in and not be questioned or accused of being gay. I would try to talk in a deep voice and even stood away from any girly activities like dancing, cheerleading, and anything that would seem or come off as “gay.” The reason I did these things was because in elementary school, I was always seen as different and questioned if I was gay just because I would play jump rope with the girls instead of playing soccer with the boys. I never wore makeup and showed a big interest in football even though I never really cared, liked, or understood the rules of the game.

One day, I decided it was time for change. I had just talked to my therapist who was also gay and he gave me the confidence to make a change. I was tired of being a fake person. I wasn’t comfortable with myself and I was getting tired of being asked questions about whether or not I was gay. I was getting tired of acting a certain way just so no one would look at me differently. I didn’t want to put a front and mask on anymore. I was unhappy with myself so I decided it was time to start acting like my true self. One morning, me and my best friend Robert decided to skip school and go chill at one of our spots at Fort Mason. Finally had the confidence to tell him I was gay. His reaction wasn’t surprising to me because I knew I could trust him. When I told him, it felt like a weight had lifted off of my shoulders and my personality started to change. I started to become me. It felt really weird, because I was transitioning from a person who was acting like somebody else to actually being myself. I became more confident, started talking more, and started wearing the clothes that I wanted, like skinny jeans, converse shoes, and Forever 21’s latest fashion. However, because of my transition, I started to see a change in how people treated me. I started to get targeted by strangers because of the clothes I was wearing. One time, I even had a bald white guy shove me at a bus stop and call me a “faggot.” I didn’t react, because I’m better than that. And yes, I know, I am here and I am queer.

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